Friday, 14 June 2013

All that you see is you, and all that I see is me.

This morning when I woke up, the bright sunshine was beaming in through the gap in my curtains, my head lay peacefully on my familiar pillow, but my arm was completely numb.  I pushed myself up with the other arm and looked at my feeling-less arm. The lack of feeling in that one limb had an affect on my ability to recognise it - it could have belonged to anyone. I had the thought that after 45 years it should be more than a bit familiar to me. 
I lay back down with my numb arm lying flat on top of the duvet waiting for the positional change to aid the feeling to come back - which it did.
Once, several years ago, I had a big, flat section of tree trunk positioned for me in my garden to use as a chopping block to enable me to split my own logs. 
It had been too heavy for me to move on my own.  One day, I took a phone call and was given some devastating news.  Crying, I walked outside and, without effort picked up that chopping block and threw it over the fence into the recently harrowed field that formed a boundary around my cottage. Later when I thought about what I'd done, I didn't recognise the person who had suddenly displayed immense physical strength.
Sometimes, you may catch yourself trundling through life, no fuss, no upset, no bother, no drama. You might surprise yourself when you respond (or react) to a life event in a way that leaves you reflecting and asking, "Was that me?!"  
Don't underestimate, and certainly don't block, your body's ability to express itself!  
If we practise speaking up and saying what we really feel on a daily basis, then it'll be less liable that we are ever faced with a stranger in our body venting, shouting, screaming out in a way that feels completely alien to us. Constructively expressing what you're feeling now promotes physical and mental health and helps you get your needs met.  All aspects of who are you should never come as surprise - you should be able to recognise yourself from the inside out, in the calm and in the turbulent times.
"Have the confidence to step into yourself and step out as the one and only you." - Hussein Nishah

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